You know, it always took me so much time to have opinions on something that I never thought there was a way to change perspective quickly. I changed that opinion, together with many others.
I wrote before about what happened to me this summer, but it was mostly to give a status on my current health, ignoring most of what I experienced in that month and a half I was hospitalised.
I’m not sure what I could write about it, as everything happened for me in a fairy way to begin with, and I was able to understand what happened only by reading my own file, or rather that part of the file that they did allow me to get.
The first changes in my perspective happened while I was in the intensive care unit; the room had five beds, I was the number three, right in the middle of it, in front of the doctors’ “console”. With one exception, I was the only patient in the room who was able to talk (the exception was represented by a man burn on the job, who stayed just one night). There were old men who had trouble while under surgery, one so confused that tried more than once to come down the bed, removing his tubes, there was a boy younger than me that had a car accident (he was the passenger of a Porsche which sped up at 180Km/h), and so on. It made me think.. also because there was little more to do. Sure my mother brought me something to read, mainly Lupo Alberto comics (I love Lupo Alberto), but I wasn’t able to read that much, plus it was difficult to read with the oxygen mask on.
So when I came home I decided I would try to do less boring things, and try to enjoy my time more – that’s why I’m not working on Gentoo as much as I was before – and as soon as spring comes I’ll be trying again to get a driving license. Then, a job and some social life, possibly a job that I enjoy. I also decided that there’s little point in trying to save money for more important thing, as I can’t be sure that I can make use of the long term savings. This is why I maybe have spent more than I should have lately, in DVDs, books and a few more things.
I also decided that the time I spend to maintain farragut here as a server is time that I don’t enjoy enough, so the news is that the blog, the repositories and my site will move out of farragut soon. I’ll keep the blog URL as that’s too bad to lose, even if everything will move to a (paid) vserver soon. My time is worth more than I would be paying to keep it in a vserver, plus there’s electricity bills, noise and heat that I’ll be able to cut down a bit more. And less hardware maintenance. Actually, with this change I might be able to resurrect Klothos (the Ultra5) without buying more expensive hardware: farragut will be once again a testbox, and as a testbox it can use a cheap Realtek network card and a very very cheap SATA controller (as long as FreeBSD supports it), and the two cards now in Farragut will return on Klothos.
And for who’s wondering: an year of vserver rent would be less than the price of the two cards.
I’ll be announcing here when the move will be, I’m still taking contact with the future provider.
This also means I’ll be very welcome if someone else would take over what I was doing before, so that I can dedicate myself to things I enjoy more. Last year at this time I would probably have been fighting with something I don’t enjoy, just to help. Don’t even let me start with maintaining stuff I don’t give a damn about (like, well, PAM :/); you certainly won’t see me returning to maintain CJK apps, or KDE, or whatever. Just what I need, use, enjoy!
As a long term Planet Gentoo reader, I was wondering before your illness, when you might get ill.Think about your sleepless nights, you wrote about in your blog!I think you are turning in the right direction. I wish I had turned in thisdirection when I was at your age.Good luck!